Guard This Man |
"You didn't lose the man on purpose — you just got busy. Here's how to get him back." |
Guard This Man
There's a verse most men skip past. One soldier. One order. One job: guard the man I gave you. Not win the war. Not be a hero. Just guard him.
This was the message we walked away with in May this year when 6 of us travelled to a men's gathering in Johannesburg: "Guard This Man". We went because...we took time out, why?
Because life happens. Noise, chaos, real demands pulling from every side. And little by little — not all at once — the soldier drifted. Busy here. Busy there. Nothing dramatic. Nothing on purpose. Until one day, the man was gone.
Sound familiar?
Here's the good news nobody preaches enough: drifting isn't a verdict on who you are. It's just a warning about where you're headed — and warnings can be answered.
You didn't wake up one day and decide to walk away from the man God's building in you. Nobody does. It happens in inches.
A missed morning. A skipped prayer. A little compromise that felt harmless. That's not weakness — that's just what happens when nobody's guarding the gate.
But you can guard the your gates.
Starting today.
This is the part that should lift your head, not lower it: God isn't asking for a perfect man. He's asking for a guarded one. A man who notices the drift before it becomes distance.
Who builds the hedge back up the moment he feels himself wandering.
You don't need to fix five years of drifting in one afternoon. You need one decision, made today, to guard this man a little more closely than yesterday. |
Tip of The Day |
STOP, pause for a minute...
You have to guard this man. Every man carries a weight and sometimes it becomes too heavy.
Take time out to give focus and attention to "this man".
Go take a walk, stand up early and take time to think, contemplate and consider where you are and what must change. |
Continue....
Every father who finished strong wasn't the one who never drifted. He was the one who kept coming back to the post.
That's your assignment too.
Not perfection. Just presence. Show up. Guard the mind. Guard the heart. Guard the hours nobody's watching. That's how legacy gets built — one guarded day at a time.
You are not too far gone. You are not too busy to start again.
Guard this man. He's worth it. Your family needs him. Your future depends on him.
Today's the day you pick the post back up.
I trust this meant something to you, as it meant to the 6 of us, who travelled, and we going again next year May 2027.
Wishing you a great day
Carven Izaks |
35 Comments
Join the conversation
Started reading this on my lunch break and now I'm sitting in my car not wanting to go back inside yet. Something about this needed a moment to settle.
Would love to hear more about what was actually discussed at the gathering. Maybe a follow up piece? What were the sessions like? What did men walk away deciding?
"A man who notices the drift before it becomes distance." That's the goal right there. Awareness first. Everything else follows from that.
My wife actually sent me this. She said this is you. And she was right. Not easy to admit but she was right.
Ronnie_MthathaRespect for admitting that. Most men would get defensive. The fact that you could hear it says something good about you.
Johannesburg gatherings for men are becoming more common and I'm glad. We have sports events and braais but very few spaces to actually talk about what's going on inside.
Zakhele B.True. The braai is great but we all go home the same as we arrived. These kinds of spaces where you actually sit with something real are different. Glad more of them are happening.
Real talk the hardest part is noticing you've drifted. Because when you're in it you just think this is normal life. You lose your own reference point.
I haven't prayed properly in weeks. Not once. Reading this made me want to go do it right now. Small step but it's a step.
This is the kind of message that should be in every men's WhatsApp group. Not jokes and braai pictures. This. Send this to your brothers today.
Warren T.Sent it to my group this morning. Already three guys replied saying they needed this today. You're right, this is what those groups should be for.
Six of you went together. That's the key detail people are sleeping on. You need brothers who will go with you to these things. You can't do this alone.
The "little compromise that felt harmless" part got me. Because that's always how it starts. Just this once. It's fine. And then it's not fine anymore.
Took my son to something similar last year in Cape Town. Watching young men process this stuff openly was something I won't forget. More of this please.
Pieter du PlessisThat image of young men actually opening up stays with you hey. My dad never had that and I never had it growing up. Glad it exists now for the next generation.
Guarding the gates. That image is going to stay with me. A soldier who drops his guard doesn't mean to. He just gets tired. We all get tired.
Moses KhozaTired is the word. And when you're tired the last thing you have energy for is guarding anything. That's exactly when the drift starts. This really puts it into words.
Honest question, are these gatherings open to any man or do you have to be part of a specific church? Asking because I don't attend regularly but I want to be in spaces like this.
Tumi_PretoriaFrom what I know these gatherings are usually open to any man regardless of which church you attend or even if you don't. The one in Joburg had guys from all kinds of backgrounds. Best to reach out to whoever organised it and just ask. Don't let that stop you from going.
I appreciate that this doesn't shame men. It just says hey, notice the drift and come back. No drama. That's the approach more people need to take.
"You don't need to fix five years of drifting in one afternoon." That took pressure off me that I didn't even know I was carrying. Thank you.
Andile M.Same. I read that line twice. Been beating myself up for years thinking I had to somehow catch up all at once. One decision today. That's it.
My father needed this 20 years ago. I need it now. Glad someone is putting this out there for men to read.
Nhlanhla_ZAThat's the thing, the need doesn't change from generation to generation. Just the willingness to talk about it. Good on you for being here.
The soldier who drifted because he got busy. That's every man I know including myself. Nothing dramatic just slowly not showing up for yourself.
Gerhard V.Nothing dramatic is exactly it. That's what makes it so easy to miss. If it happened all at once you'd notice and fix it. But inches? You don't even feel it happening.
When are the next gatherings happening? I keep seeing these reflections and I want to be in the room where these conversations are happening.
I was at that gathering. Can confirm it was exactly what a lot of us needed. The room was full of men who looked like they had it together and then broke open completely.
"God isn't asking for a perfect man. He's asking for a guarded one." I'm saving that. That changed how I'm thinking about my walk today.
Six men took time away from family and work to go seek something better. That alone is inspiring. Most of us can't even put our phones down for an hour.
The part about a missed morning and a skipped prayer being where it starts. That's exactly how it happened for me. Exactly.
Wish more men's gatherings produced content like this. Johannesburg is far for some of us but the message travels. Keep sharing.
"It happens in inches", that line right there. Nobody tells you that. You just wake up one day and wonder how you got so far from where you were.
SiyandaKAnd then the shame of realising it makes you want to drift even further. Like you're already too far gone to bother coming back. That's the trap.
This hit me hard. I've been drifting for months and didn't even realize it until I read this. Thank you for sharing what came out of that gathering.